1: A boy goes to his mom and says "I won a car in a race!" The mom feels proud and says "Really? How many people were there?" The son says "Two" The mom says "Oh, only two? Who were they?" The son says "The car owner and the police."
2: Do you know how to not get a divorce? Bruh, just don't marry.
3: The teacher says "In which battle did Napoleon die in?" One kid stands up and says "His last one"
4: Churchill says "Yesterday I dreamt that God made me prime minister of the whole world." And Roosevelt says "Yesterday I dreamt that God made me president of the whole world." Then Stalin says "How could you gentleman dream of such things, I didn't dream of giving you these positions!"
5: A man goes to rob a school. And then, the paralyzed kid gets scared and starts running. The blind kid says "He can walk?" The mute kid says "He can talk?" Then the deaf kid says "He can hear?" Then the Athiest kid starts praying to God to save him. The orphan says "My parents will miss me" And the homeless kid says "I'm going home!"
6: A man goes to the forest and sees a bear. Then he starts praying the bear doesn't see him. After that, he sees the bear praying as well. He asks the bear "Why are you praying?" The bear says "I always pray before I eat."
ENDING IT OFF WITH A LUCKY NUMBER... 7:
A bird layed an egg in mid-air but it didn't fall. Why? It was wearing underwear!
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